» Can it be true?

Cheating Spouses – is your husband cheating on you online?

Chas — Mon, 03 Jan 2011 09:47:14 +0000

Cheating spouses can, of course, be male or female but the normal expectation is that it will be the husband doing the cheating rather than the wife. While that may have been true in the days of ‘stay-at-home’ wives it no longer holds with many women being exposed to the same temptations as their husbands both at work and socially

That said however the fact is that a cheating husband is not as adept as a cheating wife in hiding an affair from their other half! Here’s a few ideas if you reckon you have a cheating spouse….

Is Your Husband Cheating? – 3 Ways To Get Proof

By Vincent Reed

There comes a time in your marriage that all seems to fade away. It is not like before the first time that you meet that everything is all about love. It is so perfect that nothing can ever ruin your relationship. However, that all change when the kids came and money is the problem. As soon as there so many things to fix up, most of the time the husband turns away, and that is the start of infidelity.

Usually men like to turn away from the marriage, especially if they want more fun in life and adventure. And they could not see the excitement anymore in the relationship. At this time, you will notice that he is so busy in work suddenly. He would get angry in an instant, trying to find problems or even creating one. He will spend time on the children but not with you. Sleeping with him in bed is like sleeping with a log.

You are trying to fix the problem but with no use. He would not budge and he would not take an effort for it. These are most of the signs that there is infidelity.

Here are three ways to get proof that your husband might be cheating.

1.) Personal computer check. It could be a PC that he uses or a laptop. Most men like to hide something in their computers. You could check folders and directories that you could see unusual. Check for history when surfing online, they could be checking dating sites, or adult rated websites. Signs that his interest in you is fading off. Intimacy is not working with both of you.

2.)Social networking and online instant messengers and emails. Some men like to create 2 or even 3 social networking accounts so that they could share it with other personal friends and leave the main account for you without updates. Check online logs when having been chatting online.See Emails where are they being send, most of it are saved in the send folders. You could find most of the proofs there.

3.) Cell phone, check the phone book for names who are very new to you. They would tend to use a guy’s name, especially if they have an interest of the lady they would like to send messages with. Check the send items and check the received texts. See if there is something different. Check also calls durations. Monitor how long has he been talking with another person.

If you want to learn more to check for proof if your husband is cheating without getting caught by him,

Then Click Here To Learn More How To Use The Tool. Use It To Know If Your Spouse Is Really Cheating On You Or Not.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Vincent_Reed

http://EzineArticles.com/?Is-Your-Husband-Cheating?—3-Ways-To-Get-Proof&id=5637377

Mobile phones, more and more, are taking over from computers as the means of surfing the internet and messaging and are therefore more than ever the ‘weapon’ of choice for a cheating spouse. But you have access to the technology to catch them at it – husband or wife (our software makes no distinction! A cheat is a cheat!)

Husband’s Affair – What to do Next? Advice on Next Move Needed

Chas — Thu, 22 Jul 2010 13:05:33 +0000

I have suspected my husband’s affair with another woman for some time now. The changes in his behavior are, according to so many, indicative of an affair. If it’s true then I need to know what I am supposed to do next.

If I accuse him without evidence or prematurely then it really becomes a matter of “he said, she said.”

Considering that I have been faithful for our ten years of marriage and that I want to be assured that I am right before I confront him on the issue I have confided in a few very close friends. The overall opinion (which I agree with) is that I need to catch him in the act, be able to provide hard evidence in black and white, and find the absolute proof. It’s been said that if I decide to divorce him over this it will go easier if I have the absolute and irrefutable proof.
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So I guess I am wondering exactly what I am supposed to do next. I know that there are all kinds of handy devices that can help me decipher his emails or instant messages, but I can’t say that I am all that technically savvy. I wouldn’t want to install something on his computer only for him to find out about it the next day.

Naturally, this is emotionally traumatic for me, so I am looking for some very simple, straightforward advice on what I should do next. My husband’s affair has the power to rip our family apart. The only way for me to empower myself is to hold the evidence in my hand. I can’t possibly hire a private investigator without him noticing the sudden expense. Please help send me in the right direction so that I can be absolutely sure and have the proof of infidelity in my hands before I confront him.

ANY ADVICE FOR THIS READER? COMMENT BELOW…

Spotting Emotional Infidelity Signs – It ain’t that hard!

Chas — Sun, 05 Jul 2009 19:29:29 +0000

Spotting emotional infidelity signs can be just as traumatic as spotting signs of a sexual affair. Emotional infidelity can carry a harsh sting, as the rationale that “it was just sex” flies right out the window. Emotional infidelity is a clear sign that your partner is sharing of him or herself in some of the most intimate ways that far outweigh the sharing of body parts.

The first sign of emotional infidelity is your partner’s sudden desire to spend more time away from you and more time toward someone else, even if that time is spent online or on the phone. There is a sense of withdrawal from you, a sense that your partner isn’t really there and present with you while he or she seems a little happier than normal.

It’s like you start living parallel lives rather than a life together. It can happen without a lot of warning. Sometimes it just seems that your partner has found a new friend or is going through an emotional rebirth of sorts. The problem is that you are being left out of the process and you can feel it.

Emotional infidelity can happen without a lot of awareness on either partner’s side until the emotional intimacy with the third party is well grounded. By then, you have been feeling left out, somewhat alone, and have a sense of loss of emotional connection with your partner.

There are some more obvious signs, like overhearing phone conversations that reveal intimate details that you are unaware of or finding chats on the computer that seem extremely personal. It should be noted that many partners are totally blown away to find that their partner is experiencing emotional intimacy with a friend of the same gender. With attitudes changing and more relaxed attitudes sweeping the country, many individuals are finding that they suddenly have the freedom to explore intimate emotional feelings that a special friend might elicit.

Some people find some comfort in emotional infidelity with a same sex friend and others find it even more distressing. Anyone with curiosity can fall into an emotionally entangled relationship without ever taking it to a physical level.

Emotional infidelity can usually only be detected and confirmed when you catch your partner in the act. You might have your suspicions as the distance between the two of you grows and the emotional bond to their new friend grows to undeniable levels. It is not always easy to deal with, but many couples can bounce back from emotional infidelity once the problem has been identified.

Many people who indulge in emotional infidelity are not quite as conscious of their actions as they would be of physical infidelity simply because there is such a fine line between confiding in a friend and blossoming a purely spiritual and emotional relationship. Some people do not recognize it until it actually causes a problem.

If you suspect that your partner is engaging in emotional infidelity, the best course of action is to express your needs for more emotional connection on an ever increasing level until the true intentions of your partner are realized.

Monitoring Websites Visited by Your Partner. What are they hiding?

Chas — Mon, 29 Jun 2009 18:21:18 +0000

Perhaps the ethical question isn’t so much how do you monitor websites visited by your partner without getting caught, but should you check up on those sites visited by your partner? We could make the argument that a good relationship is built on trust. If you can’t trust your partner, then perhaps there is more to worry about than whether he or she is visiting websites that you wouldn’t be comfortable with. Yet, there are situations which do call for different perspectives and different solutions.

Before you opt for any type of keystroke logger or website history monitor, try asking the questions outright. Keep in mind that the month before a birthday or a special occasion a partner might become a little more secretive about their internet usage because they are trying to actually do something sweet for you. Arguably, this is rarely the case when you start becoming suspicious of their internet activities.

There can be more than one reason that a partner is suddenly guarding the computer, switching web pages the instant you walk into the room, or moving the computer to a more private location. Most people first think that their partner is having an affair. There are also gambling websites or gaming websites that have the potential to destroy the family’s financial health.

There are also websites that offer medications without a physician’s prescription that offer mind altering substances. There are also natural buds websites that offer herbal remedies to get high legally. Any of these could hold the potential for a serious impact on your relationship, and usually as the money in the bank account starts to dwindle, you can figure out which websites are attracting your partner.

Unfortunately, most of the suspicious behaviors are indications of affairs, or at least the flirtation of an affair. Many men and women start off with the intention of making some strong connections with people with similar interests and end up becoming excited over someone they meet.

If your questions are evaded with vague answers, inconsistent explanations, and outright lies there is definitely cause for concern. If there is a basic trust issue between you and your partner, the cause for concern is much greater. You can opt for the spying technique.

Spying on your partner’s online activities isn’t really all that difficult. There are ample software applications that can do everything from track websites and record chats to those that can actually block access to certain websites so that the growing affair can be shut off without your partner ever being aware that you know about their potential infidelity.

Before you start monitoring websites visited by your partner you might want to consider that you are about to find out information that you obviously don’t have. If it turns out to be nothing more than innocent emails trying to arrange a surprise getaway for the pair of you, you’re not going to feel too great about your own actions. If it turns out that your partner is stringing along not just one but multiple additional lovers, the slap you may feel could be intense.

You can get an entire daily history emailed to your account from their own computer in order to find out everything that is going on in their life. Just be sure you are ready and able to handle the information that you end up receiving before you take the plunge into spying on your partner’s online activities.

Help in Surviving Infidelity – Sucks Don’t It?

Chas — Sun, 14 Jun 2009 18:44:50 +0000

Most people who experience being at the duped end of infidelity need a little help in surviving infidelity, although some people seem to take it in their stride. I could cut right to the core of the issue and simply state that if monogamy is a requirement for the continuation of the relationship then you’re better off knowing that your requirements are not being met. However, that usually doesn’t soften the emotional impact of the infidelity problem.

Most people who experience infidelity go through a myriad of emotions from anger to devastation to even a little bit of guilt. The strength of these emotions can be highly overpowering. You can feel angry enough to want to cause physical or emotional pain even though you probably know that it won’t assuage the feelings that you are experiencing.

The first step in surviving infidelity is to find an outlet for all the feelings that you are experiencing. A friend’s ear or a therapist work for some while sports or journaling/diary writing work for others. I believe a combination of outlets works best. A little talking, a little physical exertion, and a little self reflective exercises can be very effective in working things out. There is no denying that you have been wronged, but most of the time the wrong that was done has absolutely nothing to do with you. It has everything to do with the person that cheated on you.

I knew a woman once who went and had an affair when she caught her husband having an affair. While it is not something I would recommend, this eye for an eye deal seemed to work for them. They remained married until his death 15 years later and not another word was spoken about it. Again, it’s not my style but if it works for your relationship, who am I to judge that?

Most people who need help surviving infidelity do not always recognize the legitimacy of their feelings. They feel as though their feelings are running them over and they don’t realize that these feelings are part of the process. The reason that people surviving infidelity have such issues is that they tend to feel as though the foundation that they built their life around was false. It wasn’t. The foundation that the life was built around had everything to do with what you wanted from life, and your perception of it. If your partner stepped away from that, then your foundation and beliefs are still the same.

Deciding to move forward with your life usually happens after you’ve experienced your feelings and figured out how you want to respond to the infidelity. There is a process to dealing with your emotions and making decisions day by day. You don’t have to make any permanent decision until you feel like it.

Every day, whether you’re talking about the actions of a committed partner, a traffic accident, or the tragedy of a loved one, harsh stimulus is thrown our direction and we feel we must figure out how to respond to it on a permanent level. There is no rule that says you can’t simply take things day by day and try to make the best decisions for you along the way.

11 Signs Of A Cheating Husband

Chas — Tue, 05 May 2009 11:52:02 +0000

Nothing can be more heart breaking then believing that your husband is cheating on you. When you first begin to suspect that your husband may be being unfaithful — start to pay attention, and try to include yourself into his plans. If your husband is cheating on you, chances are he is not going to want to bring you along when he leaves the house!

While including yourself in his activities is one way to gauge whether or not your husband might be having an affair, here are several more signs that your husband may be cheating:

He is continuously working late
He comes home smelling of perfume
He is decreasingly interested in sexual activity
He has lipstick on his clothing
When he comes home, he heads straight to the shower
Or, he is freshly showered when he comes home — and he doesn’t have a shower at work!
He avoids communication and starts to “clam up” more than usual
He has unexplained behavior and uses ambiguous excuses
Receives calls at odd hours of the day or night
Is secretive about his phone conversations
He takes a renewed interest in his looks

If your husband has recently been with another woman, he will try to avoid getting into close-quarters with you, especially when he gets home. Oftentimes this is to hide any scent that he picked up, or to try to hide makeup smudges, lipstick, or other telltale signs of extramarital infidelity. A rebuff when you offer him a ‘welcome home’ kiss can speak volumes!

In many cases, if he’s being unfaithful, he will become accusatory toward you and suspicious of your actions; he will start to act jealous, and suggest (or even outright say) that you are cheating on him! While this isn’t true, it’s a form of human nature — we often accuse others of the very thing that we are guilty of ourselves. It’s a subconscious way of trying to deflect the guilt he might be feeling

While some of these signs are borderline proof of infidelity, just because your husband exhibits one, or even a few, of these signs it does not mean that he is definitely a cheater. As we get older, sometimes we change. Also, sometimes life just throws a curve-ball at us, and we need to be left alone for a while.

The best thing to do if you suspect that your husband may be cheating on you is to observe first, and if his behavior continues only then should you confront him. The pain of a false accusation can stir up the same feelings of betrayal that present themselves when a spouse is cheating on the other, the last thing you want to do is to wreck your marriage over a misunderstanding.

While here at Cheatcatcher we mostly promote pro-active behaviour to confirm your suspicions some times the answer might be as simple as printing off this post handing it to him and asking him if you have anything that you need to be concerned about!

Is Your Wife Cheating On You?

Chas — Sat, 02 May 2009 15:41:41 +0000

Even thinking about the fact that your wife may be cheating on you can be heartbreaking and devastating enough. If you suspect cheating and infidelity in your marriage, there are usually signs, or hints, beyond your “gut feeling” that she may be seeing other men.

Here are a few signs of a cheating wife that I am most asked about on this site:

Unexplained behavior or ambiguous responses to direct questions
Secretive phone conversations
She starts deleting her computer history when she hasn’t in the past
A sudden decrease in communication
Changes in her sexual preferences or drive
Starting arguments for no apparent reasons
Changes in her daily routines
A renewed interest in her physical appearance
Going out with friends more often
She suddenly has an interest in being away from the house

Look for changes in attitudes and any comments or remarks that your wife makes toward you. Does she attempt to get you out of the house, or does she bolt for the door every time you come home? Try offering to go out together, maybe for a date night, or just a quick lunch. If your wife uses examples like, “I have plans” or, “I don’t feel like going out”, especially on an ongoing basis, there is good reason to believe that she is hiding something.

Usually when one person in the relationship is starting fights with the other one, there is something wrong in the couple’s relationship. Disagreements, and even the occasional verbal spat are common in relationships, but when this is constantly happening, your spouse is probably hiding something from you. Aggression in this form may also be a sign of guilt.

If you have a good relationship with your wife’s friends, you could try asking them about your wife’s behavior. While their loyalties may remain with your wife, you may be able to gauge your mutual friends’ reactions to see if there is something worth worrying about. Also, if your wife is using her friends as an excuse to be out and about all the time — you may be able to catch your wife in a lie by talking to her friends.

While it’s a terrible feeling to even think that your wife may be cheating on you, living with the constant doubt is even worse. In order for you to keep your own health and sanity, you either need to get proof of an affair or infidelity, and then confront your spouse, or choose to put your feelings aside and trust that her whole heart is yours.

Is an Emotional Affair the Same as Cheating?

Chas — Thu, 30 Apr 2009 18:35:27 +0000

In this ever-changing world, it seems that even the terminology of old is taking on new context. It used to be that the idea of cheating was something that was black and white. In today’s society, there is now a grey area known as an emotional affair.

For some people, an emotional affair is just as bad as cheating in a relationship whereas others feel that an emotional affair is nothing more than an annoyance in a relationship. To understand what an emotional affair truly is, there needs to be a more defined definition of the term.

An emotional affair is when you or your significant other starts an adult friendship that goes too far. This is not when one person physically cheats on another; it is when they seek out the love, and affection, of somebody besides their significant other. Emotional affairs oftentimes start out innocently enough, but if there is an emotional void in a relationship, sometimes these adult friendships cross the line and take on a dangerous dynamic.

While an emotional affair is a form of cheating, many times, the “cheating” partner may not even realize what has happened initially. No, it does not fall into the old-world definitions of cheating, but it is a form of it, nonetheless.

When someone commits an emotional affair, they are pulling themselves away from their spouse mentally and emotionally and relying on somebody else for their emotional needs. This usually results in the person spending less time with their spouse and more time with their new friend. They find that it is easier to go to their friend with problems and concerns and build an emotional comfort zone with them. This is truly an affair of the heart – physicality does not have to be involved, but often will be eventually.

For many people, an emotional affair will eventually lead to a physical affair. Once the emotional connection is made with another person, it is much easier to become intimate with him or her. Instead of being emotionally connected to their spouse, they are more in tune with their friend; this change of heart and attitude can be devastating to a marriage. A natural progression of an intimate emotional bond is physical intimacy — being caught up in an emotional affair is a slippery slope.

In fact many partners feel more betrayed by an emotional affair than a physical one. Someone sleeping with a stranger they just met while on a sales trip can seem less threatening than a ‘platonic’ affair that involves confidences, trust and affection.

Just as a physical affair is cheating, so is an emotional affair. In some ways, having an emotional affair is much worse than a physical one. While the pain inflicted due to a physical relationship outside of the marriage can be devastating, the wounds due to betrayal of the heart may never mend.

How To Cope With A Suspected Cheater

Chas — Tue, 28 Apr 2009 20:41:57 +0000

Cheating is all too common in relationships. It is unfortunate, but in many cases, it is true. However, there are times when jealousy can cloud a person’s vision, making them envision their spouse’s infidelity based on unfounded feelings. So, how should you cope if you suspect your spouse is cheating?

First of all, don’t jump to conclusions. Observe your spouse’s behavior. How has their behavior changed? Ask yourself what makes you think that your spouse is cheating, and make sure that your reasoning is rational. Be honest with yourself. If you are normally a jealous and insecure person, make certain that you are not overreacting. Take it one-step at a time. Watch how your spouse acts around you and others.

If your spouse is cheating on you, here are a few signs that they may be exhibiting:

A cheating spouse may start spending more and more time away from you. They will probably make excuses to go out, and probably exclude you from their plans.

A cheating husband or wife may seem detached or disinterested with you, with the kids, and home life in general.

A cheating partner may become defensive if you question them about something, even something seemingly innocent; if a question can relate to their potential infidelity, it may cause them to appear “snappy”.

If your somebody is cheating, they may start to take more of an interest in their appearance. Maybe they’ll start dressing better when they go out, they’ll put on perfume or aftershave, they’ll start working out; whatever it is — they will likely work to improve some physical attribute so as to appear more attractive to their new partner.

Usually, a cheating spouse becomes more secretive. They will answer the phone in another room, they’ll clear their cell phone’s text-message history, they’ll erase their internet browsing sessions, and they’ll give you ambiguous answers if you ask them who they were talking to.

A cheating husband may start coming home late or leaving for work earlier. They also may start working weekends or working days off for no apparent reason.

It is important to note, though, that these are not steadfast guarantees of cheating. Sometimes, any of life’s ups or downs cause us to react in one way or another, and the “signs” of a cheating partner that you’re seeing are simply your spouse’s reaction to their life at the moment. Now, it’s also important that you are not foolish, either. If you suspect your spouse is cheating — become observant.

Pay attention to what your spouse is doing, and try not to let on that you think that they are cheating. As you are concerned about your spouse, you should notice these changes, but do not show them that you are hurt, because truthfully, you don’t have any proof that they are, in fact, cheating on you. You may want to confront your spouse on your suspicions, but it is best to wait until you have proof of infidelity before confronting them — a false accusation can be as damaging as the act of cheating itself.

So, how do you prove your spouse is cheating? Use a recorder. Leave a recorder on while you go out and your spouse is at home to see if you catch any information. Make sure it is in a place where it will not be noticed or appear as if it was left on purposely. If your spouse is making a habit of going out regularly or running to the store quite often, follow them. If you can’t follow them yourself, have someone that you trust keep an eye on those regular trips. If all else fails, hire a private detective — private investigators can catch infidelity, and offer up definitive proof so that you can confront your spouse.

If your spouse is, in fact, cheating on you, and you have the proof — then you can confront them. Jumping to conclusions, and especially if you accuse your spouse of cheating on you when they really aren’t, is a good way to risk irreparable harm to your marriage over a simple misunderstanding.

How to Confront a Suspected Cheater

Chas — Sat, 25 Apr 2009 18:33:16 +0000

Infidelity is one of the primary reasons that relationships break up. Now, you may suspect that your spouse is cheating on you, and you want to confront him or her — but you’re not sure how to proceed. You should take a few things into consideration before you march headstrong into a one-on-one confrontation with your spouse.

First of all, remain calm and keep your composure. Losing your temper will solve nothing. It fact, it will likely make matters worse. Confronting your spouse with your concerns doesn’t have to turn into a shouting match. Do you have proof that your spouse is cheating? If so, what type of proof? Are you assuming that your spouse is cheating?

Perhaps because a friend of a friend saw your spouse talking to someone of the opposite sex? Make sure you have more to go on than hearsay or speculation before confronting your other half.

If you confront your partner with little-or-no proof that he or she is cheating, you could be creating trouble where there is none.

You should also be careful about involving friends or relatives in your confrontation. For instance, if you mention that a friend or family member saw your spouse with someone else, he or she may want to confront the friend or relative. That person may not want any further involvement even though he or she inadvertently became involved by informing you in the first place. The point is that by disclosing such information to your spouse, you could be causing a stressful situation for your friend or relative. It may be best to have further proof of cheating before confronting your spouse.

You should also consider the possibility that your spouse may not be cheating. Even though a friend or relative has seen your spouse with someone is not evidence that they are cheating. The person could be an old friend or co-worker. Engaging in a conversation, or having lunch, does not constitute having an affair. You’re probably wondering why your spouse didn’t mention the person or situation if it was so innocent. It could simply be that your spouse didn’t think it was important. Spouses do not always relate every single detail of their lives to each other, but that does not mean they are hiding something.

If there is reason to believe that your spouse may be cheating, and you want to confront them, do so tactfully. Tell your spouse that you have concerns and need to talk. Approach the subject openly and honestly by telling your spouse that they are a very important part of your life. Reaffirm your love for your spouse. Express your concerns without using an accusing tone. If your spouse isn’t cheating, they should be understanding of your concern. If your spouse is cheating, your expression of affection should make them feel a twinge of guilt.

You should never directly confront an abusive spouse alone. An abusive spouse may fly into a rage and cause you physical harm. You must consider your safety first. Have a friend or relative come over if you plan on confronting your spouse. If you prefer to confront your spouse alone, then do so in a public place. Your spouse will be less likely to become aggressive in public. Don’t rush to confront your spouse, but rather — take time to calm down and think things through.

Most often, a cheating spouse is not going to admit to their indiscretions voluntarily. If you do have proof of infidelity, be prepared for them to become defensive. It’s a natural reaction to get all ‘upset’ when put on the spot. If you don’t have the proof, and be told that your accusations are ‘mad’! — they may find it hard to forgive you and your relationship may become strained.

Confront if you must, but make sure you have the facts before accusing your spouse of cheating.